it's been a while.

well well well. what did i expect? i would keep up with this thing daily. oh no no. of course i had good intentions of keeping up with this better. but i guess there's not much going on right now in my life, so i don't feel the need to update so much. but i guess after a month of not blogging...i shall update on life.

i'm still unemployed....but i have been searching and....[drum roll!] APPLYING! yes, i have applied to jobs! hurray for me! i got on the "job searcher" train. right now i am still waiting to hear anything from the 8-10 jobs that i have applied for so far. i still have a long road ahead and have a lot more work to do when it comes to my job hunt. but i am not being idle and succumbing to the fear of putting myself out into the real world. i have applied for several preschool teaching jobs and teacher assistant jobs. once i get the needed information from a reference, i will be applying to a developmental specialist job. which, by the way, is my dream job! it is a job that works with children and their families. it is based around early intervention which works with children birth to 3 and trying to help these children being diagnosed and treated in a more timely fashion in one that will help them[the children] be more successful in school. that is the goal. to prevent problems in the future. this is what i want to do. i want to help children with special needs get the needed treatments, therapy, help, etc to make them as successful as possible as well as helping them lead as close to a "normal" life as possible. i only have two things holding me back...1. experience and 2. credentials--but what's the harm in applying. at least my name will be out there--for their future reference. and who knows maybe i will impress them without having those two things and they could potentially be willing to work with me as i seek to gain more experience and obtain my credentials. i also want to go back to school, so that will be another thing on my to-do list over the next few weeks and months.


so that is about it. not much else to say. i'm still searching and hoping to find my place right now. there are a lot of heart issues as well as mind issues that i'm working through. life is tough. and i wasn't ready to face some of the bigger things, but i am being forced to overcome my fears and anxiety and push on through my struggles. i am striving to be the person that God wants me to be. it's been a slow process. snail's pace really. but i'm working on it. i know God can use this dirty, broken vessel. i do have a purpose, and i have meaning because of Him. for that i a thankful.


[i apologize for my random ramblings and such...it's just how my mind works at times] :)



peace and love.