things i love.

Fall is my favorite season.  I love the sights, smells, and tastes of fall.  One of the most fun things that comes every year like clockwork is the Dixie Classic Fair.  I went twice this year.  The first time with friends and the second time with my parents.  I always eat too much---and the worst possible things.  But I soooo enjoy it.  My favorite place to eat now is at the Amish booth.  They have the BEST pretzels and donuts.  They are made fresh every single batch.  The deliciousness is almost too much to handle.  But I handled it just fine, I guess.  Both nights. The first night, the donut I ate came dripping with sweet delicious icing.  So much so that some decided to make a home on the bottom of my pants.  Caution: Never eat a fresh dripping donut while walking.  You will make a mess, be a mess.  But it's worth it!  The next thing to look forward to is the BBQ Festival in Lexington. [Besides the every day joys of the smell of leaves and the change of the colors...oh, and anything pumpkin!!]  Here are a few pictures I've taken on my phone of some of the "fallish" things I've enjoyed this far.

Now I'm looking forward to enjoying some of my favorite fall/winter food.  Soup, chili, stew--especially Chicken Stew!!  Happy Fall! 

A month without Sam.

It's been a month since we lost one of our fur babies, Samson. It's hard to believe he's still not gonna greet me when I come home or coming flying down the stairs when it's time to go outside.  The last 3 months have been rough ones because we've had to deal with finding out Samson had cancer, losing him, and both of our other dogs have had some health issues. My heart can't take losing another one so soon.  Samson was such a good dog. He was a love. I thought I was getting better until this morning when I checked my email. And I got this picture with a note that said "I miss u Jilene".

Yes, obviously it wasn't from Samson. My dad sent it. But it made me cry. Because at this stage in my life, I don't have my own children(human ones), I have my fur babies. So losing them is very rough. Especially when you've put so much time, energy, and emotion into taking care of them. I have done a lot of that since May. Especially when I was here by myself when my parents were in Mexico and Michael was at work that weekend(May). I had to take Sam to the vet because he was not getting better...and it was then that I knew he wouldn't be around much longer. That was a really rough time. But we didn't want to selfishly hold onto him.  So the day we came home from work and he had gone blind in the time we had been gone that day, we knew it was time.  I will never forget him. He was so funny. He had some human characteristics that I just loved about him. I miss him howling when the phone rang, and pawing me when he wanted more lovies. I miss his "butterfly kisses" and him jumping up in his chair to look out the window to see us when we drove into the driveway. There are so many other things that I will miss about him. He was a great dog. He will forever be in my heart.

I've already moved on...

Sometimes you have to let go and move on. I know there are many times in life when we have to do this. Sometimes those times are in moments of contention. You just decide to let go of the fight because it's not worth fighting. When the argument is not beneficial...and no progress can be made. It's the moments where you take the high road. Sometimes those times are when people cannot see through their own pain and troubles. They may not understand, and want to continue the argument to make their point, but its just a waste of breath. It's a waste of your breath, time, and energy too...when they don't listen...or they continue beating "the dead horse," as the saying goes.

I, myself, am tired of having the same "argument" and hearing the same old thing over and over. This time is when I don't respond and waste my time in doing so. It's the time to continue moving forward with my life. Like I've been doing. No need to beat dead horses. They're already dead anyway.

your words.

2Continue steadfastly in prayer, being watchful in it with thanksgiving. 3At the same time, pray also for us, that God may open to us a door for the word, to declare the mystery of Christ, on account of which I am in prison— 4that I may make it clear, which is how I ought to speak. 5Walk in wisdom toward outsiders, making the best use of the time. 6Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person. Colossians 4:2-6

I've been at my aunt's church the last two Sundays. This passage was what the pastor preached on today. I've been constantly reminded of the power of my words lately and how they can affect others, but also how they can come back and haunt me. Even if what I said was not meant for malice or to inflict pain, they can be taken the wrong way and twisted into something else. My prayer today was for God to help my words be few. Calculated. Encouraging. Challenging. Worthy of other's ears. Pleasing to God. I can be too quick to speak and too quick to cast judgement. I want my words to be gracious and ones that are used for telling others about what God has done in my life and what He has done, can do, and will do for them if they ask. 

random post.

This post is completely random....but I just needed to express some of my irritations. I can become very easily irritated. It's not one of my attractive qualities because I become irritated and impatient with people very easily. I'm working on it, but it's hard. Old habits die hard. First of all, I can't stand being treated like a child. Especially when it's by someone a good bit younger than me. I have to hold myself from saying something very un-Christlike. Second, I can't stand being told what to do---going along with the first thing. Thirdly, and probably the MOST irritating is when someone twists my words and lies to other people about me. More than being hurtful...it really makes me mad. The anger builds up and I want to scream and punch something (or in this case...someone). It's especially irritating when these lies are being told to make me look like I'm a hateful person. When in fact, I'm not. I don't intentionally act in malicious ways towards others.

I'm trying my best to be the person and woman that God has made me to be, but this life is very difficult and situations come up that test our character. I know I'm not perfect...and will never be. I fail my Savior everyday. I don't always look like Jesus. But I'm trying very hard to have an attitude more like His and be the person described in Titus 2:7-8:

7 Show yourself in all respects to be a model of good works, and in your teaching show integrity, dignity, 8 and sound speech that cannot be condemned, so that an opponent may be put to shame, having nothing evil to say about us.


I know this was a random post, but I want to be honest in my posts. No need to sugar coat. The truth is always better than lies or putting on a show or wearing a mask. 

My Father knows best.

I'm so thankful that my Savior died for me.  I'm so thankful to have a way to the Father. I have the free[and very much undeserved] gift of salvation.  God loved me so much that He sent His Son to die for me and cover me with his precious blood and let His body take the most horrific beating...all for me. All because of Love. If only I could love the way Jesus does--unconditionally--and sacrificially.  This is not an easy thing to do.  But it's something I want to make a serious effort at doing.  Some people are easier to love than others, but we are called to love one another.  

This brings me to another thing I'm thankful for.  I'm thankful for God's mercy and grace shown to me and His love drawing me closer to Himself and for the freedom of having an attitude that is more like His.  Although, this is a continual process, I can say that He has changed me so much over the past several months.  My attitude is so different than what it had been and He has shown me things and given me the direction that I had asked Him for.  It's funny how His answers aren't what I wanted, but ultimately they have been for my best.  For that, I'm thankful.  He didn't give me my yes, because He knew the place I had thought about going--was not the place for me.  He's shown me that I'm in just the right place.  He's changing my heart every day and He has given me a new out look on the place He led me to almost 7 years ago.  

God is good.  ALL THE TIME.  

What are you thankful for today?   

PS.  Sometimes I ramble--so for whoever reads this---forgive my seriously lacking writing skills. :) 

The Good Shepherd

"I am the gate; whoever enters through me will be saved.  He will come in and go out, and find pasture.  The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.  I am the good shepherd.  The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep.  The hired hand is not the shepherd who owns the sheep.  So when he sees the wolf coming, he abandons the sheep and runs away.  Then the wolf attacks the flock and scatters it.  The man runs away because he is a hired hand and cares nothing for the sheep.  I am the good shepherd; I know my sheep and my sheep know me--just as the Father knows me and I know the Father--and I lay down my life for the sheep.  I have other sheep that are not of this sheep pen.  I must bring them also.  They too will listen to my voice, and there shall be one flock and one shepherd. The reason my Father loves me is that I lay down my life--only to take it up again.  No one takes it from me, but I lay it down of my own accord.  I have authority to lay it down and authority to take it up again.  This command I received from my Father."   John 10:9-18[NIV]


Today in my Lifegroup we did what we call our "Jesus Board".  Here is what it looked like:

Jesus Board--March 24, 2013

As I was reading through some of the scripture written on the board this morning--I came upon this passage about Jesus, our good Shepherd.  After a very powerful morning in Lifegroup, our communion service, then in Bible study this afternoon--I've been reminded[as I need to be quite often] how incredible and amazing our Savior is. For the past four Sunday nights, my parents and I have been watching "The Bible" mini-series on tv.  Although the writers of the series have taken creative liberties and not everything is accurate--the heart[and purpose] of the story[the Bible] is still present.  The Bible was written to tell us about God and His great and mighty love for us.  It begins with the creation of man, then the fall of man, then the rest of the Bible leads us on the journey to the ultimate end and the restoration between God and man. Our Redemption in His Son, Jesus.  We see how God takes and leads His people through the good and bad.  Through their obedience and their falling away.  He is constantly pursuing His people--because He loved them.  That's the bottom line.  He loves us.  Therefore, He sent Jesus down to this world so He could live a perfect life and die an undeserved death to atone for our sin on the cross.  His broken body and shed blood, a perfect sacrifice to pay a debt[for our sin] that we could never repay. 

In this passage from John,  Jesus is telling us that He is our good Shepherd.  He wants to take care of us.  Even when we wander away, He goes out searching for us to draw us back to Him and to the security of His protection.  He is so passionate about His sheep[us] that He was willing to lay down His life for us.  He didn't have to, He did it out of His great love for us.  He, Jesus, the Son of God, who has all authority in Heaven and on Earth--willingly laid down His life.  Jesus knew what He came down to Earth to do.  He knew that His life would be brief on this Earth, and that it would end in His death on a cross for His sheep, but He knew that was not the end of the story.  He was the prophesied Messiah.  The King who would rescue His people.  He did not do it the way the Jews were expecting, but it happened just as God ordained it.  

This passage struck a chord in me tonight and brought me to tears.  This week known as Passion week--all leading up to Good Friday and Easter--is one in which we tend to reflect on what our Savior did for us on the cross over 2000 years ago.  I needed this reminder today.  The reminder of how great my Savior's love for me is--and that no matter what I've done or will do, He will always love me.  He's always there to take my burden. Forgive my sin. Comfort me.  Provide for my needs.  But, I don't want to just remember what Jesus did for me once a year.  I want to know it. Live it.  Every day. Jesus didn't die for me so I could be thankful that I have the free gift of salvation once a year.  It's an every day thing--one in which I constantly honor Christ with my life.  Because of God's great love for me---I should be obedient to His commands. I should live my life to please Him every day.  That is our one true aim. To live a life that glorifies God in all that we do.  Not just once a year---but every. single. day. I've failed at living out my faith.  But that's how it started.  It started with my faith and trust in Jesus.   I acknowledged my sin, accepted Christ's gift of salvation, and now I should live every day in response to what He did for me and share that gift of love with everyone.  

I don't want to forget or take for granted what my Savior did for me.  Not ever.  He's all I need.  He's the reason that I live. 

Oh hail, Redeemer, hail

For He has died for me

His praise and glory shall not fail 

throughout eternity

Majesty, Lord of all

Let every throne before Him fall

The King of Kings

O come adore

Our God who reigns forevermore 

[Chris Tomlin,  Crown Him (Majesty)]